"Advocate for Yourself": Abby Magro

This feature piece is one of a series highlighting native West Hartford 20-somethings. In each feature, you will hear a little bit about this person’s approach to “emerging adulthood” through either personal narrative or interview-style discussion. This week, meet Abby Magro.

Abby grew up in West Hartford and graduated from Hall High School. She went on to graduate Magna Cum Laude from UConn in May 2010 with a degree in Mechanical Engineering. She just completed 8 months at Westinghouse Electric in Pittsburgh, Penn., as an Assistant Project Manager, and now she’s in the process of moving to Albany, NY, to work for GE Energy, where she did an internship during college. Abby loved living in Pittsburgh, where she spent her free time playing the local sport favorite Dek Hockey: “Roller Hockey without the skates,” as she describes it. Her team proudly made it to the local championship this Spring! Abby only roots for Pitt when they are playing Syracuse, and she always roots for UConn no matter where she is.  he looks forward to eventually moving back to West Hartford.

Without further ado, here's my interview with Abby, who tells fellow 20-somethings, "Advocate for yourself," and "Enjoy what is given to you at each moment."

Emma Staffaroni: How do you respond to the question: "What are you doing these days, Abby?" when asked by someone you haven't seen in a while? Do you answer differently if it's a peer, an adult, your dentist?

Abby Magro: I usually start out by saying that I currently live in Pittsburgh. This usually progresses to the person asking me questions about Pittsburgh based on incorrect stereotypes and generalizations. I then have to defend to city of Pittsburgh against this onslaught, which I think I do pretty well! The city has so much pride and loyalty to all those within it. I have never been anywhere that sticks together quite like Pittsburgh.  

If I'm speaking to a peer I'll highlight the nightlife there, which is surprisingly quite entertaining, and for an adult, I'll highlight the cultural district, which has great fresh fish and meat . . . For whomever I'm speaking to, I will for sure highlight the amazing panoramic views and tight-knit communities that have been solidified by the steel industry. Basically, describing the city is a convenient diversion to actually answering the loaded question “what are you up to these days?". . .

I’ll also tell people that I just graduated from UConn and now work at a local engineering company. If I am talking to a peer I am probably a little more blunt and honest about how I like my job. I'll put a little swing on it for an adult, and completely lie to my dentist and tell them its the best job I ever had. 

ES: When you were younger did you have expectations for your 20s? If so, was this vision idealistic, realistic? Accurate?

AM: When I was in middle school and younger, I really thought that by the time I was in my 20s, I would be a super bad a**. I thought I was going to be mixing up chemicals to produce the newest cancer drug. I think when we're younger, the 20s seem so far off. It feels like we've got plenty of time to go to school and get a degree in something that sounds good in the Sunday paper, and then invent the cure to cancer. Even as I got to high school and saw a long four years of college ahead, I thought there would ultimately be a great job that I could do forever, right out of college. Not to mention the dollar signs in my eyes . . . The thought that there could be a long road filled with difficult jobs, tight economic times, and not really knowing what I want didn't really occur to me back then. 

ES: How would you say that a "West Hartford upbringing" has shaped who you are and what you’re doing today? And do you think you'll move back to Weha one day?

AM: What was great about West Hartford, which I don't think many other places can offer, is the diversity of opportunities for any type of kid.  The school system really offers a good education for many different types of learners. Whether you liked sports, fine arts, or science, in West Hartford there was something for you. When I was in school, I was able to join a Math Team, a Community Orchestra, and a Dance Company – all at the same time. I think this really gives kids the opportunity to find what they actually like. My brother is now in college successfully studying technical theater design thanks to what West Hartford was able to offer him.     

Another thing I loved about growing up in the area was the diversity of people. Although some would say our school systems are not as diverse as others, since I have moved to Western Pennsylvania I really appreciate the diversity I experienced when I was younger. I have not had Spanish rice as good as the stuff made by the locals near Kennedy Park when I was a lifeguard there! 

I think when I am ready to start a family I can see myself moving back into West Hartford. There are lots of things that as an adult I will be able to enjoy more than I would as a person in my 20s. My parents still live in West Hartford and are probably more involved in local happenings than I am in Pittsburgh!

West Hartford really gave me the opportunity to become a well-rounded person. The one problem is that I think lots of West Hartford people miss out on great parts of the Hartford community.    

ES: Who is your hero, and how does s/he inform your choices as a 20-something?

AM: My parents are totally my heroes! They're in their 50s and having the time of their lives. They worked really hard when they were younger in order to get where they are today, and I respect and admire that drive. I mirror many of their choices where I can in my own life: thinking early about saving, getting a meaningful education . . . and most of all, enjoying what's given to you each moment. My parents taught me that you can always change the hand that was dealt to you. It may not be perfect, but you can always take advantage of a bad situation. 

For example, my first job out of college was a difficult assignment for me because it wasn't on the career path I really wanted to take. My mom had the same problem when she was first out of college, but she took advantage of the situation by meeting people who'd eventually get her one of her favorite jobs later. I followed her example and met some great mentors that helped me to steer my career in the right direction.

ES: Tell me your impressions of the job-finding process. Did you use the career center at your school? Did you do it on your own? What's your advice for people seeking jobs in Corporate America?

AM: I used the career services at UConn. It was how most of my people I graduated with secured jobs right out of school. I would really recommend it because searching on your own for jobs is a nightmare. My junior and senior year at UConn, I also went to lots of presentations and seminars run by corporate employees. It's another way to get your resume in the hands of employers. The presenters are usually more candid about how they like their jobs, too.   

I'd also recommend applying to EVERY job posted at your school, even if you're not completely qualified. I got a few offers for jobs outside of my field that I seriously considered taking. But I have to say, it does require work on the part of the applicant! You have to advocate for yourself! You'll only get out what you put in.  

ES: Describe some of your biggest priorities at this point in your life, and what that looks like on a day-to-day basis.

AM: Money is a big one. I am pretty comfortable in the job I currently have, but this is the first time in my life where I actually have to budget. It has been a bumpy road getting used to having to think before I spend. I had a job when I was younger, but never had to worry about rent or food, so I didn't really worry about where my money went. Now I have to be dilligent in tracking where my money goes each month. 

Thinking ahead is also a priority. I like to enjoy where I am now, but I am always trying to make sure I am in the right spot for the future.  

Staying active. Everyone needs to blow of steam to be healthy! I prefer team sports over the gym and spend three days a week playing the local favorite, Dek Hockey. Recreational teams are all about having fun and being healthy. It also totally helps me to de-stress!

My romantic life. My current boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year now and he is a big part of my life. We play together on one of my Dek Hockey teams, too.

Staying in touch is another big one. This is one of the aspects of my life that I work the hardest at. Now that I live a plane ride away from most of my friends and family, I have to make a huge effort to stay in touch. In my 45-minute ride home from work, I make it a point to get a hold of at least one person each day. If I go home for a holiday, I make sure to at least get coffee with my friends who are still in the area. In today's world, it is easier to keep in touch because of technology, but you still have to work at it!  

Finally, self-education. The thing I'm working the hardest at is learning the new environment that is Corporate America. There is different etiquette, and you have to work every day to learn it.  I also enjoy going to local museums or science centers. Life is boring if you don't keep learning! 

ES: Alright, so imagine you can go visit your 16-year-old self for ten minutes. What would you say to teenage you?

AM: I'd say, "Don't worry, it doesn't matter in the long run."  Those were words I'd heard many times from my family and friends, but which I'd never really believed. That bad grade I got on the math test, or that fight I got into with my friend; none of these things had an impact in the long run. In my old age, I've learned some patience and resiliency. There will always be something wrong, some crisis, or someone upset, but you can't let things bother you. If you do, you'll have no hair by age 25. It's actually a great feeling to know that I have the energy for the crises that matter, because I let the little things go.