Just Say No to Butterfinger Peanut Butter Cups, West Hartford Town Council, State of the Town Address

Good morning, West Hartford! Today is Monday, Jan. 27, 2014; there are 338 days left in the year.

Kids, I’ve written extensively how the candy industry has taken a wrecking ball - the real kind, not the Miley Cyrus kind - to my childhood. From jelly beans, to candy corn to candy canes, corporations have taken life’s simple pleasures and bastardized them.

Know how the forces of evil in the Lord of the Rings took the elves and twisted and mangled them until they became orcs? Such is the state of my childhood candies.

Now the candy industry has gone too far. Waaayyyyyy too far.

Behold the Butterfinger Peanut Butter Cup.

What the cup is this?

Kids, much like the rules of Highlander, there can be only one peanut butter cup. And it’s Reese’s.

Listen, I have no stake in this game. I don’t own stock in Reese’s, nor do I particularly care for peanut butter cups.

But you can’t improve on perfection.

I’m all for capitalism - and competition is at the heart of it.

But there is no room in the market for such willy nilly products as another peanut butter cup.

We don’t need another Snickers. We don’t need another Twix. They’re awesome already and don’t need to be improved upon. Same with Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.

I’m like this dude, only substitute in Reese’s for Britney Spears. LEAVE REESE’S PEANUT BUTTER CUPS ALONE!!!!

Here’s five things going on in West Hartford this week:

1. Richard Bernstein a civil rights attorney, marathon runner and triathlete, will share his powerful life story of challenges and successes, his passion for sports and his dedication to fighting legal battles on behalf of individuals with disabilities. The event will take place at 7:30 p.m. at the Chabad House, 2352 Albany Avenue in West Hartford. Admission is $10 prepaid, $12 at the door, $100 sponsorship benefiting the Friendship Circle.  Friendship Circle Members are free. To register log on towww.ChabadHartford.com, call 860-232-1116 or emailinfo@ChabadHartford.com.

2. The West Hartford Town Council will meet on Tuesday at 7:30 p.m.

3. The Committee to Review Operations of the Registrars of Voters will meet on Monday, Jan. 27, 2014, at 5:15 p.m., in Town Hall, Room 312, to discuss a review of the administration of 2013 municipal election.

4. West Hartford Women in Networking will meet at 7:45 a.m. on Jan. 30 to discuss social media.