This post was contributed by a community member. The views expressed here are the author's own.

Health & Fitness

Looking to find your son a mentor?

We know that mentoring is a mediated process in which the relationship itself serves as a development tool (Rhodes, 2002, 2005). This means that mentoring works through the vehicle of the unique relationship that develops between a particular mentor and a particular mentee: in other words, through the relationship that develops between you and your mentee. It also means that mentoring works when your relationship works. Since the mentor-mentee relationship stands at mentoring’s core, it is vital to understand three things: what a good mentoring relationship looks like, what helps to create productive mentoring relationships, and what is likely to do the opposite.

This is an area where researchers have a great deal to offer current and aspiring mentors. Compelling research tells us that a meaningful relationship between a mentor and mentee is one marked by trust and mutual regard and understanding (Rhodes, 2002, 2005). Our experience tells us that productive mentoring relationships have another essential ingredient, namely, opportunities to have fun. Very few enduring mentoring relationships seem to last without it. There is also a strong and growing body of knowledge telling us that mentoring relationships are more likely to take root and thrive if (1) mentor-mentee expectations are aligned; (2) mentors and mentees are well matched; (3) mentors have access to a support system that can help them prepare for the mentoring experience; (4) mentors are able to adopt a good mix of authority and friendship in their relations with their mentees; and (5) mentors have a source for and ongoing access to “advice and counsel” from those with the experience and expertise to help them employ best practices, avoid common pitfalls, and handle any rough spots that emerge.

In contrast, factors that we believe thwart the development of good working relationships relate to the most practical of considerations (Are you reliable?) and the decidedly personal (Are you mentoring to help a young person succeed or to direct his development?). Good working mentoring relationships rarely result when mentors find it ....

To read more ... Go to Teenagesons.com

Find out what's happening in West Hartfordwith free, real-time updates from Patch.

We’ve removed the ability to reply as we work to make improvements. Learn more here

The views expressed in this post are the author's own. Want to post on Patch?